Shayari [must read]

<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"> <div style="text-align: center;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">•♥°·shayari·°♥•</span></span></div> <div style="text-align: center;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div> <div style="text-align: center;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;">  aapki ek muskurahat ne hamarehosh udadiye, hum hosh mein aane wale the, ki aap phir muskura diye...apni bebasi se acha doosron ke gum ki dawa ban jao tum, tanha samjho jis mod par... najare utha ke dekhna,hume us mod par khada paoge tum....... dard ko bhi ab dard hone laga hai, dard bhi apne gum ab khud dhone laga hai, hum dard se ab nahi darte, dardhumein chookar ab khud rone laga hai... badalna aata nahi hame mausam ki tarah, har ek roop mai unka intezaar karte hai, na wo samet sakenge jis kayamat tak, kasam khuda ki unse itni mohabbat karte hai hum... bekhudi ki zindagi hum jia nahi karte, jaam doosron ke cheen kar piya nahi karte, unko mohabbat hai to aakar izhar karein, peecha hum kisi kakya nahi karte...... aasuon ko palkon par mat sajana, baat dil ki kisi ko na batana, log mutthi mai namak liye phirte hai, apne zakham kisi ko mat dikhana... pyar karo par dokha mat dena, kisi ko aasuon ka tohfa mat dena, dil se kose koi tumhe zindagi bhar, aesa kisi ko mauka nahi dena... har taraf khamoshi ka saya hai, zindagi mai dost humne aap sa paya hai, jhoomtey hai hum aapki yaad mai, aur jamana kahta hai ki phir pee ke aaya hai... aaj bhi unki nazaron mai raj wohi tha, chehra wohi tha, chehre ka libas wohi tha, kaise usko bewafa kah du yaron, aaj bhi unke dekhne ka andaaz wohi tha... meri chahat mai kami kuch na thi jane wo kyu begane ho gaye, wo samjhtey hai khush hu mai, magar mujhe hase to kai zamane ho gaye... zindagi hai nadan isliye chup hu, dard hi dard hai subh shaamisliye chup hu, kah to du zamane se dastan apni, lekin usmai aayega kisi ka naam isliye chup hu... Zuban Hi Sirf Ek Zaria Nahi, JoAaap Shabdon KO Samajh Paayenge. kabhi Aankhon Mein Jhaank Kar Dekhiye, Hazaro Alfaz Khud B Khud Bikhar Jayenge. Dil Ko Adat Si Ho Gai Hai, Chot Khane Ki,,Bhigi Palko Ke Sang Muskrane Ki, Kash Anjam Hum Pehle Se Jaan Jate,To Kosish Bhi Nahi Karte DilLagane Ki. Khamosh Raat Ke Pehalu Mein Sitare Nahi Hote,In Rukhi Aankho Me Rangin Nazare Na Hote... Ham Bhi Na Karte Parwah Aap Ki, Agar Aap Itne Pyare Na Hote…</div> </div>

Shayari [must read]

•♥°·shayari·°♥•  aapki ek muskurahat ne hamarehosh udadiye, hum hosh mein aane wale the, ki aap phir muskura diye...apni bebasi se a...

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Jokes [MUST READ]

<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;">-=[2]=- A mathmatician, a physicist, and an engineer were all given a red rubber ball and told to find the volume. The mathmatician carefully measured the diameter and evaluated a triple integral. The physicist filled a beaker with water, put the ball in the water, and measured the total displacement. The engineer looked up the model and serial numbers in his red-rubber-ball table. -----o0o----- </span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;">-=[3]=- What's the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers? Mechanical engineers build weapons. Civil engineers build .targets. -----o0o---- </span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;">-=[4]=- The wireless telegraph is not difficult to understand. The ordinary telegraph is like a very long cat. You pull the tail in New York, and it meows in Los Angeles. The wireless is the same, only without the cat. -----o0o----</span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"> -=[5]=- Scientists at NASA have developed a gun built specifically to launch dead chickens at the windshields of airliners, military jets and the space shuttle, all traveling at maximum velocity. The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields. British engineers heard about the gun and were eager to test it on the windshields of their new high speed trains. Arrangements were made, and when the gun was fired, the engineers stood shocked as the chicken hurtled out of the barrel, crashed into the shatterproof shield, smashed it to smithereens, crashed through the control console, snapped the engineer's backrest in two and embedded itself in the back wall of the cabin. Horrified Britons sent NASA the disastrous results of the experiment, along with the designs of the windshield, and begged the U.S. scientists for suggestions. NASA's response was just one sentence,"THAW THE CHICKEN!" -----o0o---- </span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;">-=[6]=- An astronaut in space was asked by a reporter,"How do you feel?" "How would you feel,"the astronout replied,"if you were stuck here, on top of 20,000 parts each one supplied by the lowest bidder?" ----o0o---- -</span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;">=[7]=- During the heat of the space race in the 1960's, NASA decided it needed a ball point pen to write in the zero gravity confines of its space capsules. After considerable research and development, the Astronaut Pen was developed at a cost of $1 million. The pen worked and also enjoyed some modest success as a novelty item back here on earth. The Soviet Union, faced with the same problem, used a pencil. -----. ...o0o--- </span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;">-=[8]=- If it wasn't for Thomas Alva Edison, we'd all be watching TV to the light of a candle. ----o0o---- -</span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;">=[9]=- An engineer, a mathmatician and an arts graduate were given the task of finding the height of a church steeple (the first to get the correct solution wins a $1000). The engineer tried to remember things about differential pressures, but resorted to climbing the steeple and lowering a string on a plumb bob until it touched the ground and then climbed down and measured the length of the string. The Mathematician layed out a reference line, measured the angle to the top of the steeple from both ends and worked out the height by trigonometry. However, the arts graduate won the prize. He bought the vicar a beer in the local pub and he told him how high the church steeple was. -----o0o----- </span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;">-=[10]=- The great mathematician John Von Neumann was consulted by a group who was building a rocket ship to send into outer space. When he saw the incomplete structure, he asked,"Where did you get the plans for this ship?" He was told,"We have our own staff of engineers." He disdainfully replied:"Engineers! Why, I have complete sewn up the whole mathematical theory of rocketry. See my paper of 1952." Well, the group consulted the 1952 paper, completely scrapped their 10 million dollar structure, and rebuilt the rocket exactly according to Von Neumann's plans. The minute they launched it, the entire structure blew up. They angrily called Von Neumann back and said:"We followed your instructions to the letter. Yet when we started it, it blew up! Why?" Von Neumann replied,"Ah, yes; that is technically known as the blow-up problem - I treated that in my paper of 1954." -----o0o---- </span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;">-=[11]=- An engineering student is walking along when a fellow student arrives on a new bicycle. Impressed, . ...he asks,"Where did you got this beautiful bicycle?" "Well,"the second engineering student says,"A couple of days ago I was just walking along when this georgeous blonde pulls up, hops off the bike, rips off all her clothes, and says'take what you want'." The other engineering student nods and says"Good choice. The clothes probably wouldn't have fit." -----o0o---- </span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span></div> </div>

Jokes [MUST READ]

-=[2]=- A mathmatician, a physicist, and an engineer were all given a red rubber ball and told to find the volume. The mathmatician ca...

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ENGINEERS

<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"> <div style="text-align: center;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;">o0----------------0o </span></span></div> <div style="text-align: center;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;">-o0o- </span></span></div> <div style="text-align: justify;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;">Three men: a project manager, a software engineer, and a hardware engineer are helping out on a project. About midweek they decide to walk up and down the beach during their lunch hour. Halfway up the beach, they stumbled upon a lamp. As they rub the lamp a genie appears and says"Normally I would grant you three wishes, but since there are three of you, I will grant you each one wish." The hardware engineer went first."I would like to spend the rest of my life living in a huge house in St. Thomas with no money worries."The genie granted him his wish and sent him on off to St. Thomas. The software engineer went next."I would like to spend the rest of my life living on a huge yacht cruising the Mediterranean with no money worries."The genie granted him his wish and sent him off to the Mediterranean. Last, but not least, it was the project manager's turn."And what would your wish be?"asked the genie. "I want them both back after lunch"replied the project manager. </span></span></div> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><br /></span> <div style="text-align: center;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;">----o0o----</span></span></div> </div>

ENGINEERS

o0----------------0o  -o0o-    Three men: a project manager, a software engineer, and a hardware engineer are helping out on a project...

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